At a PTQ a few weeks ago, I sat down against my round four opponent and wished him good luck. He had an awkward expression on his face, and sort of just sat there for a minute before drawing his seven. After the match he sort of apologized and said that while he will wish his opponent's good luck after the match, he doesn't before the match before because he doesn't mean it.

I've talked to a lot of players who have this same mindset. They don't like to lie, and they don't want their opponent to have any luck – they want them to mulligan to four and keep that no-lander. They want the win, and whatever gets them to that point is fine with them.

When I wish my opponent's luck, I truly mean it. What I want of any game of Magic, even one at a PTQ, is a game where both players are given the same opportunities, and I manage to win through superior play. That's my ultimate goal – to play better than my opponent. That's what I take enjoyment in – playing the best Magic I possibly can. I think this is a pretty good mindset to have.

There isn't anything inherently wrong with not wanting your opponent to get any luck, but it leads to a dangerous mindset that I have seen claim the careers of more promising players than almost any other – the win is all that matters. While it will do wonders for your ability to win any single given game, over the long haul it is unsustainable. Magic is, by its very nature, a game of chance. There is a lot you can do to skew the odds in your favor, but sometimes you will lose for no other reason than luck. You need to accept that as part of the game and get over it.

You could argue that in a real life tournament the difference between losing a close game and losing a blowout is irrelevant, which is true, but that doesn't mean it has to have been. It is important to eek out every single percentage of advantage you can during a game of Magic, and to constantly work at improving your game so you do get those small percentages. Missing out on a single point of damage might not matter in a game where you got blown out to a turn 3 Primeval Titan, but it does matter in the long term of your career as a competitive Magic player

The reason is something that batting coaches, tennis instructors, and golf pros talk about non-stop: "follow-through." If you've ever played a sport, you've probably been given a lecture on this on a more than a few times, probably because it is unintuitive. If your goal is to hit the ball with the bat, so everything after that moment of contact should be meaningless. What does it matter if your swing goes to the right after the hit? It doesn't influence the way the ball moves in the air.

Here's the thing about a swing - there is a lot that goes into it that you don't think about. There is distance from your body, there is the angle of the bat, there is the angle of your shoulder, and the list goes on. If your focus is only on hitting the ball, then a lot of the fundamentals of what makes a good swing will end up going out the window. They get sloppy and you end up hitting the ball, but not well. If you focus on perfecting your swing, then hitting the ball and hitting it well will come naturally.

Unless you are constantly working on improving your game, and taking enjoyment in seeing yourself play better, you are going to put too much weight into the randomness that has at times made all of us ecstatic or led our friends to hide all of the sharp objects in the room.

Winning is an important tool to tell you how well you are doing, as long as you understand that not every win is your fault. Sometimes you do everything in your power to try and punt a game away, but your opponent (or your opponent's deck) just won't let you. You keep a six land and one lightning bolt hand, and they keep a three land hand with three four drops and a draw spell. Four turns later, you have three creatures in play, and they are discarding down to seven. Just because you won doesn't mean you couldn't have done it better. In an example like above, the odds were greatly stacked against you by your own hand. You should have lost that game, but you didn't. You can't let the fact that you didn't lose end up as an abject lesson in how to win.

At some point in every competitive player's career, they hit a wall. They go from a great run of making top 8s, maybe even playing on a few Pro Tours, to a string of 3-2, 2-2, 0-2 performances. Sometimes it's a format change, sometimes it happens in the middle of the season. You can always find an excuse for why everything has suddenly become more random, and skill no longer matters. Whatever the reason, their dedication to the game is put to the test. If you are the kind of player who only takes satisfaction from winning, then there is a very good chances that you will get burnt out and leave the game.

If, on the other hand, you are the kind of player who isn't in it just for the cheap wins, and can learn a lot from those performances, and even feel good about the day knowing that you played well and hit a rough spot of luck. You can see that you are improving your game play, even if it wasn't enough to win the game, and you can feel confident that if you just keep at it, you will have a good day and win a few coin flips. If you can do that, there is a better chance that you will stay in the game long enough for the downturn to correct itself.

At the end of the day, Magic is a game. It isn't a tool for self-validation, nor is it a ticket to fame and fortune. It is a hobby that we have all taken a shine to, and it is something we choose to do for fun. There is always the chance that you might be able to make some money off of it, but that should never be your primary goal for playing. If it is, just take up a second job as a Wal-Mart greeter – the chances are very high that you will make far more money in the long run doing that for twenty hours a week than playing Magic. You need to have fun because that is what will keep you coming back, and make the time you dedicate to it worth it.

If you make the focus of your enjoyment something that isn't under your control, then you risk going through periods where you are playing the best Magic of your life, but you are miserable because you keep losing close games to one-outers. You also risk having the time of your life when you are playing terribly, but you just keep drawing what you need. Both of these will end up reinforcing bad habits and bad ideas in your head. There are times when there is a right play and a wrong play, and if you let your previous success with the wrong play cloud your judgment (or the fact that the right play hasn't been working) then you will make the wrong decision.

There may be times when you aren't playing well, but that is something that is always under your control. If you didn't play well in a match, it is something you can and should take accountability for. It doesn't matter if you won or lost the match, you need to be able to tell yourself 'I'm going to play better next round' and do it. Your enjoyment and what you take out of Magic is now under your control, and I think you'll find that you are happier for it.