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Beloved Patrick O'Halloran-Gannon is the stupid first seed so I'm sitting here writing this article on my iPhone waiting for his Top 8 adventures to play out. POG has Jeff Jao, probably the best player left in the tournament (and quite possibly the best player in the tournament) in the quarters so we might be headed to the Korean BBQ before too long.
If I sound a mite salty it's because... We'll... Our Hero just lost his win-and-in. And to the boring-est deck! Hopefully I'll have shaken out all the salt before dinner.
Our weapon of choice:
Boros Aggro | Pioneer | Michael Flores
- Creatures (16)
- 4 Bonecrusher Giant
- 4 Monastery Swiftspear
- 4 Pia Nalaar, Consul of Revival
- 4 Soul-Scar Mage
- Instants (4)
- 4 Play With Fire
- Sorceries (8)
- 4 Reckless Impulse
- 4 Wrenn's Resolve
- Enchantments (12)
- 4 Chained to the Rocks
- 4 Kumano Faces Kakkazan // Etching of Kumano
- 4 Showdown of the Skalds
My friend Lan D. Ho made this deck (physically) for me. He thought Boros was going to be one of the best decks, and if anything, the only minus was that I didn't get a chance to contend with it before it had become an established player in the metagame. Lan provided important insights and even a sideboard guide! Props to my very good friend (even if I didn't win).
So anyway, Round One I was sitting next to Jeff and flashed him a Monastery Swiftspear. "Oh thank God," he laughed; shuffling his Greasefangs and giant Vehicles. "I'm glad you came to your senses."
With only one real swing left in the season (I decided to spend Saturday with my daughter, who is about to move back to college, rather than at a two-slotter) I'm glad it was with Inspiring Vantage.
The incentives to Boros are two, and quite distinct:
- It's close to the fastest offensive goldfish deck; I won a game on turn four on the draw!
- ... But it's also the best grinding / value / card advantage deck in the format. The value structure also allows you to mulligan a little loosely, hands-wise. I kept a lot of one landers as a result of losing almost all my die rolls. An eight pack of Wrenn's Resolve can solve a lot of early ill luck; at least in games you aren't "always" going to lose because you already lost the die roll.
"I played two RCQs with Hallowed Fountain in front of me," I told Jeff. "No Top 8s."
Round One: Alexis with Gruul
Alexis opened on Zurgo Bellstriker.
I evaluated my hand and thought about how a game starting on a not-hasted 2/2 for 
was going to go. I'll be the Control.
So instead of Soul-Scar Mage I played Chained to the Rocks. Y'all all know how I feel about Chained to the Rocks.
It was going to be a tough back-and-forth because Kari Zev, Skyship Raider has Menace. Alexis was able to remove my first two Momma Pias. But the last one stuck and threatened to take over the battlefield!
But Alexis had Ghor-Clan Rampager to bowl over over one. That thing makes trample! So, I had to somehow win before he drew any kind of Shock.
I did. Whew! These little Red riding hoods sure can turn a corner.
Game 2 neither of us had a fast creature draw, but Alexis had turn two Cindervines. In a word, it was awesome. My deck did what it was supposed to, winning most of the exchanges... but Our Hero's poor life total was not where he wanted it. This time Alexis had the Play with Fire to seal the last two a turn before I could finish.
Game 3 was one of those games where going first provides a huge advantage. I even mulligan'd!
Boros 2, Gruul 1
For this matchup I sided in two copies of Portable Hole for two copies of Kumano Faces Kakkazan // Etching of Kumano. I wish I had thought more about it for Game 3, when I was on the play. Kumano into Pia Nalaar makes for formidable toughness against Play with Fire and Lightning Strike.
1-0
Interlude:
Patrick has just 2-0'd his Top 8 matchup against Greasefang. Being on the play in a Pioneer Top 8 is a hell of a drug, even especially against one of the strongest players in Jeff Jao. POG is on the Crackling Drake version of 
, so is basically threatening lethal every turn. In the Greasefang matchup it only takes one well-placed Fiery Impulse or Spell Pierce to create the opening he needs for that one turn.
Funny story:
You may have read my recap of the 2023 North American Premodern Championships a couple of months back. It was honestly one of the best weekends of my entire life, and I am glad I got to share it with POG and other good friends.
So upon making Top 4 of the main event, Lanny Huang - my recording partner at Spike Colony - started a new team / house tradition of giving speeches and expressing gratitude for the people in the room, the game, the Gathering, and our contributions to one another's lives. Lanny started out talking about Fran, David Tao, main event Finalist Etai Kurtzman, and so on. He saved YT for last.
I was pretty sure I was Lanny's best friend in the room, so after all the nice speeches he'd made about everyone else, I couldn't wait for some kind of glowing Best Man speech.
Instead I get: "Mike, I'm a little uncomfortable with how much you bully 'the kids.'"
So that's the start of my section, but POG - probably the chief bullying victim - quickly comes to my rescue. Kind of.
"Mike, you can bully me as much as you want as long as you get me a set of Sheoldreds for the Pioneer RCQ season."
"How about I buy myself the Sheoldreds, but you get to use them?" I respond.
"Done."
"I got off cheap."
Only I didn't!
I ordered the Sheoldreds but forgot to use Promo Code "Flores" at checkout; which cost me an Andrew Jackson just on the Phyrexians, you know? You should never ever make the same mistake.
Anyway it was also expensive for another reason: stupid beloved POG never even sleeved up the Apocalypses; opting for a 4-drop with honestly more power.
End interlude.
Round Two: Lucian with Enigmatic Keruga
The scout ahead of time was that Enigmatic is one of the easiest matchups for Boros. I can tell you it did not feel that way.
In Game 1 Lucian beat up all my poor guys with Wolf tokens, and gained a ton of life with stupid Tolsimir. He even had Elesh Norn, Mother of Machines to do it several times in combination with Kenrith, the Returned King.
But the one creature Lucian didn't kill was Pia herself. Thanks to some Showdown buffs, Chandra's mom was too big for Wolf rumbles, so he had to kill everyone else and leave Mrs. Nalaar in play. She started making 12+ power per turn thanks to a sequence of Showdowns.
Somehow Enigmatic got its draw, went off on turn five, and my little Thopter squadron (actually 1/1 Mike Flores tokens) out-lasted. Maybe Enogmatic really is the easy matchup!
Ok it isn't.
My draws in both sideboard games were pretty good. I probably could have won Game 2 had I played Invasion of Gobakhan // Lightshield Array earlier. But I just kept curving out with little guys!
Lucian kept having Radiant Flames and Temporary Lockdown, though. In Game 3 he came all the way back from 2 life! On the pivotal third-to-last turn, Lucian sacrifices Leyline Binding to go search for a seven. I'm eyeing the Chained to the Rocks in my hand, just waiting for Atraxa. I can exile her and attack for the kill with plenty to spare. Instead, he gets Koma.
Koma is still target-able by Chained to the Rocks, but the first token taps down my Bonecrusher Giant without a damage trigger. I get in for not-quite-lethal when a different Binding goes and becomes Titan of Industry. That kills my Chained to the Rocks and pulls Lucian out of Play with Fire range.
1-1
For this matchup I sided in Reidane and Invasion of Gobakhan for Play with Fire. I think Play with Fire might be better than Reidane because of Fable of the Mirror. Reidane did make Leyline Binding cost a little more, but it never mattered how big the God got.
Interlude:
POG has just squandered play in his Top 4 match against Rakdos Sacrifice.
He shipped to six and got no cantrips. So it was, like, drawing one card per turn off the top of his deck while the opponent played around with two copies of Witch's Oven and a Cauldron Familiar.
Am I going to get to go to drown losing my win-and-in in pork belly and bul-go-gi now or what?
End interlude.
Round Three: Collin with Mono-Green
Wow I did not realize how lopsided this matchup is. I think Mono-Green (still the most popular deck?) can only win if they win the die roll.
The pivotal turn is actually turn one. If they have a Llanowar Elves you kind of have to respect it. But if you're on the play you are often attacking for 4+ on turn two while removing all their material.
I won Game 2 on turn four on the draw with a bunch of Prowess triggers when Collin kept a hand without a first turn accelerator.
2-1
I brought in Alpine Moon, Portable Hole, and Declaration in Stone for one Bonecrusher Giant, one relatively slow Showdown of the Skalds, and all the beautiful copies of Kumano Faces Kakkazan that I had killed home with in Game 1.
A 2/2 just isn't that intimidating in this matchup, and because Mono-Green can't easily kill Pia, an extra toughness on turn two is less valuable (still smaller than an Old-Growth Troll).
Round Four: Michael with Izzet Phoenix
Though the details are quite different, is probably the color combination I played against the most, because that's what POG played to his first-out-of-the-Swiss. I think all the decks are bad against Boros on the fundamentals and tend to win only if they get the die roll.
Which is not to say you, honorable Boros mage, only win when you win the die roll (case in point I did not win this round's die roll). But their answers are always a little backward. With primarily Red removal they're often behind against Prowess or Kumano Faces Kakkazan.
Game 1 I took all of one point of damage. Probably from my own Battlefield Forge.
I sided two Rending Volley and two Rest in Peace for four copies of Play with Fire.
I ended up losing Game 2 with a Rending Volley in my hand that I could not cast. Had it been a Play with Fire I could have at a minimum saved my Soul-Scar Mage from removal, and probably just won outright; or certainly kept Fable of the Mirror-Breaker off my back.
So, I sided it back in for Game 3.
So, of course that's the game Michael saw Ledger Shredder!
Didn't matter... finally on the play this was a lopsided symphony of 1-drops and Prowess triggers. Every Pathway and Spikefield meant my next spell was going to resolve.
3-1
Interlude:
On the subject of against a deck with Jegantha as its companion, Patrick has just battled back to take the Top 4 match in a nailbiter.
He kind of flubbed turns two and three but played out of it. On turn two he just tapped out for Reckoner Bankbuster with a Spell Pierce in hand. As soon as he did it I could see the opponent tap three for Fable of the Mirror-Breaker. Which is exactly what happened.
POG played his third land and cast a Consider into an Opt. At this point he should have just said "Go" and taken his Goblin Shaman hit like a grownup but he cast the Opt to dig for I guess Strangle? This was kind of a dismal play. What are the chances he finds Strangle there? What if he gets Blitz of the Thunder-Raptor instead? So bad. Mostly because it locked him out of using his Bankbuster, which would have been basically the Opt but more mana efficient.
Anyway, he made up for the loose second turn by playing the last two turns really, really beautifully. POG saw the line to deal with a Mayhem Devil with Strangle but leave the Reflection of Kiki-Jiki, passing with one card in hand. The opponent bought back Kroxa, but instead of discarding his last card, Patrick exiled it with Blitz of the Thunder-Raptor. This was painful, of course, but dealt with the damnable thing permanently. So, it was a race between a very good Grey Ogre and a Crackling Drake at that point.
End interlude.
Round Five: August with Mono-Green
August refused to ID with POG the previous round, which set him up for first-out-of-the-Swiss but also damned his sensei. You already know I'm salty about losing my win-and-in, and here's why.
At the Round Five bell, I'm still shuffling.
August pulls out two dice and says "High roll?"
I ask if I can just call odd. August says "Sure," but drops one of the dice, because Dexterity check. It's a 1.
Have I won?
It was obviously unintentional; but there is no out here. Every scenario I'm either at a disadvantage or just an asshole. I let August roll the other die, although there is literally no reason it couldn't have been two dice. This is just stupid.
Except it's Pioneer. Everything they say about Pioneer is true specifically in the round it matters. Like every time.
The other die is a 4. I guess I'm going second?
August has a first turn Llanowar Elves.
I can play Monastery Swiftspear, Soul-Scar Mage... or Play with Fire. I play the Play and double spell on turn two.
But August has a Wolfwillow Haven and starts to brickwall me.
Argh! It's Pioneer!
If I had just played Soul-Scar Mage going first, it would have been Swiftspear and Play with Fire on the Elves. Game would have started 20-16 and probably already have been over before Old-Growth Troll could show up.
Going first, I easily got Game 2.
This is how I sideboarded:
- +2 Portable Hole
- +2 Declaration in Stone
- +2 Alpine Moon
- -4 Kumano Faces Kakkazan // Etching of Kumano
- -1 Showdown of the Skalds
- -1 Bonecrusher Giant
Game 3 was pretty interesting. I didn't have a great overall draw, but with perfect play I think I could have squeezed it out. Jon Finkel would have.
I had a decent start on Monastery Swiftspear and some 1 mana Prowess triggers but got a little unlucky on Wrenn's Resolve. Instead of hitting perfect-perfect I flipped over a Play with Fire and Declaration in Stone.
The Declaration in Stone wasn't THAT bad because maybe August would have just done nothing; given Our Hero the Time Walk. Instead they had Karn, The Great Creator and got The Filigree Sylex.
This was kind of super awful. My only clock was the one Taylor Swiftspear but I had two Chained to the Rocks that had helped her force through the previous couple of turns. But another 1-drop came to the rescue! The Filigree Sylex... Was fortunately meat to Portable Hole.
So, in comes Taylor Swiftspear again. It's Red. Great!
August topdecks a little better than Our Hero and passes with a Cavalier of Thorns and a Llanowar Elves.
I count six lands and discount the Elves. My only action is a Bonecrusher Giant and Stomp them to six. It's Red, right?
Remember when I said Jon Finkel would have won? When he won Worlds in 2000 Jon said the main thing that differentiated The Machine from mortal Magicians was that he always "paid attention." I, in this game, had not.
On August's turn, up came Cityscape Leveler from the graveyard. Where did that come from? Oh shoot, the Cavalier of Thorns the previous turn! I hadn't even thought to look in their graveyard.
I had gotten August pretty low, but the Leveler, on the way to braining Our Hero, took out poor Portable Hole.
The Filigree Sylex was about to be loose. And with it? The return of Polukranos and an Old-Growth Troll (who were hiding under Chained to the Rocks). I would also lose my Swiftspear. YT had been sandbagging two more Taylors, seeing the Sylex line coming. If I had noticed the Leveler, and killed the Elves prior to the artifact Unearth, they might have been enough to have closed out what ended up a narrow margin game. Instead, I got smashed with a lifelinking Legendary Hydra, so the final score didn't look narrow at all.
Oh well.
That was the day.
Or, not quite.
Final Interlude:
POG has just prize split for REDACTED. I would have held out for REDACTED more. Actually, I would have played. He was first seed! Come on!
This RCQ was also a $1000 tournament, so there was a decent amount of scratch on the line in the finals. I can kind of respect Patrick's decision in that he is moving back to Ireland at the end of the week and can't really use the RC invite. But history is going to remember him as second place in this tournament, and I think he could easily have taken it all. Okay maybe not "easily" but you know what I'm saying.
Maybe he'll pop for dinner. I mean he did just walk away with a stack of Benjamins.
End interlude.
LOVE
MIKE
(Actual) Final Interlude:
POG did not, in fact, pop for dinner.
End end.
