A few weeks ago I was ready to put some Gladiator vids together when my webcam stopped working. Neat.

While I tried to troubleshoot that mess (still haven't found the issue; the damn thing works on one machine of the three in my home currently and they mostly have the same configuration, down to a deep tech savvy level), a lot of Election Day anxiety from my subconscious made its way all up in my general disposition.

It became impossible to not try to shoot the moon on an article. Everything feels big right now. It's something I'm familiar with, but that doesn't really make it any more comfortable. I wanted to do one of those deep theory pieces that only like 50 people read but that are probably perspective changing for the players that get it. Some probably even need it, now and then.

But I just couldn't. There was so much going on. I could think of only complexity, but I couldn't find the energy to compose writing on any of it. Everything is exhausting, and I didn't want to add Magic to the pile, just for a few more days.

Then something delightful happened.

Speak Like a Child

I was doing my day job Magic work when I noticed a card I'd never seen before. At first it didn't mean much. I read it half thinking it was from some weirdo Battlebond or Planechase type release. Perhaps it'd just slipped through the cracks of my attention. But then I realized that, no, this is a brand new Magic card.

I don't remember what card it was, specifically. I was too happy in the moment. Pretend it's whatever recent card makes you happiest (or least angry).

And this wasn't some Limited card that time forgot, some Barony Vampire or Geyser Glider, or whatever. This was a rare card. This is a card you could elect to play when you wanted to win at Magic!

So that's when it hit me: It's been over a decade and then some since I learned of a rare or mythic card's text from somewhere other than a spoiler season preview or someone telling me about a spoiler season preview. Somewhere along the line, fairly recently, keeping up with every single reasonable option for Constructed play left me, but I hadn't noticed it that much or thought about what benefits this kind of experience could indicate for your humble narrator.

I've been playing Gladiator and drafting sets without looking at anything more than mechanics for most of 2020. Sometimes, cool cards just get by me now. And it is awesome.

Reanimate Targeting Little Kid Life

One of the heavier topics I've been wrestling with lately is this recent public discussion of the "invisible" player base and their huge numbers versus tournament players and their more visible culture. It's almost like I slipped into the casual mindset just for a second, but it was beautiful. This wasn't a card that I had dictated to me in a prearranged, lifeless way; I had discovered it. This feeling has been so extinct from Magic tournament culture for so long. Only the influential and mysterious casual "invisibles" know how powerful I felt in that moment, reborn as one of them again.

So, in the spirit of continuing to rediscover the Magic little kid inside me, I'm going to talk about little kid combos. These are combos that probably aren't winning games on their own or destroying a big pod with a single obnoxious combo on turn four. They're better than that. They're for showing that deep underneath Standard bans and big flashy attention economy nightmares like Omnath, Locus of the Most Recent One, there's a game you can be creative with, baby.

Special preference will be given to bad cards from my youth when I was a literal little kid.

Like these!

Speaking of things I'm behind on, I heard they changed phasing. I bet this still does something funny and infuriating, whatever it happens to be. If not, I don't want it. Put phasing back.

Gloom Sower is another funny angle. Go dig one out of your chaff.

Final Fortune climbs in price every few weeks nowadays, and I think it's because players have finally figured out that any card that asks you to basically concede as part of its "cost" is unholy insanity if you can just circumvent it. We should call it The Necropotence Rule.

So anyway, here we are. It's still going to be a risky venture, but the names of the cards alone work well enough together that I think you should do it.

How you win the game (or get blown out) from here is anyone's guess, but the point is the same: you lived.

They don't trample, which is humiliating by today's Standards (ha!), but this is way funnier. If we're talking about Commander, I don't know what you're doing that's making this combo and these colors happen, let alone a reason to run Sunsinger at all, but you know, we aren't min maxing anyway. We're being cute, and this is so cute it hurts.

At least nobody will think you're a threat when you play this jank. Has anyone else noticed that second place in Commander pods basically means last, no matter how many players there are? Food for thought.

If you want to cut the crap, you can just use Detention Sphere or something, like an adult.

Just remember that adults are the enemy of your inner little kid.

The more forgotten a card, the more demoralizing it is when it happens. It's probably not going to live long enough to do anything, but with Lightning Greaves and such, it could go down. Tell me you won't sleep well. Tell me to my face.

Just like the previous combo, you're going to have to add some other element if you want to accomplish something (beyond your tablemates looking at you like you're the worst, which is all I need), but sometimes it's more about sending a message than advancing a game state, per se.

Wow.

I've seen dumber interactions, but I can't remember when.

You're probably going to do better with Mirror Entity and something like Atla Palani, Nest Tender, but this is more noteworthy for a few reasons. The only one you truly need to know is that we're out here, and we're rooting for you.

I've wanted reasons to play Goblin Marshal my entire life. It's not like I think this is the car to take, I just don't feel like better rides are coming along soon.

And lest I betray everything I know, here's one last combo featuring she who severs, my main lady.

Wee!

Where a Kid Can be a Kid

Magic is a lot of things to a lot of people, but it is really important to stop taking it so seriously sometimes. A lot of people are becoming more aware of something I've known for years: tournament Magic and its grinds and tribulations are not the end all be all. Before all that stuff started, for basically all of us, there was simply a game.

2020 is the year that taught me to love Magic again in some way because I've rediscovered how to discover. Don't let the overabundance of information available now convince you that it's mandatory to expose yourself to it. Don't let someone else's idea of Magic joy impose on yours.

There's room for every approach. Even within the same player.

(~_^)

The Rascal

The Indestructible Danny West