In the dating game, the most powerful weapon a mage can have (other than his or her actual spells) is not a sword, a mace, a siege tank, the loyalty of a fearsome horde, nor even awesome cleavage. While none of the aforementioned items hurt your chances (generally speaking) of winning a given duel, what really will put you over the top as a finisher is the ability to use your eyes.

Today, we’ll take a lesson from some of the most seductive female personalities in Magic. What makes them attractive? What is sexy, anyway? While it’s nice to have a Spark and a bangin’ bod going for you, what is truly at the heart of power is confidence, wit, and the know-how to use it. The eyes are your prism, or silver mirror, or ring of power, so to speak, to properly focus and channel your considerable abilities.

Gwendlyn Di Corci’s art is interesting in that it shows a hyperaggressive take on seduction. We start with her because she’s the Elder Stateswoman of Magic seductresses, or at least the most notorious and blatant. Granted, Gwendlyn’s “suitor” pictured doesn’t look like much of a swordsman, but a conquest is a conquest, and according to the flavor text, Gwendlyn has a long history of success. She looks downright threatening, and her buzzed mullet is pretty intimidating.

A little less dangerous than Gwendlyn’s, but Patrick Swayze’s mullet is still sexually charged.

Gwendlyn’s gaze speaks of danger and excitement, while her edgy hairdo reads as confident and probably a bit nuts. We would expect Gwendlyn to be an assertive, experienced, and self-assured lover. Look at the eye contact in the art. Her gaze bores unflinchingly into the swordsman’s, demanding he reciprocate. Gwendlyn’s approach is to know what you want, confidently go after it, and bring your partner along for the ride through force of will, if necessary. They’ll thank you for it later—if they live that long, of course.

Jaya Ballard isn’t technically a seductress, but tomboys quite often fulfill this role, though they are never labeled as such. Think of really athletic chicks. Back at University of Oregon, the athletes’ dorm was notoriously, er, hormoned and active. These girls burn up the track, the court, and the dance floor, and they burn right through you, as well.

Serena Williams has a task for you. Love.

Jaya’s gaze is playful. Sporting. She looks right at us. Her smirk is a dare, whereas Gwendlyn’s is a command. We would assume Jaya likes to have fun in all areas of her life, and that the challenge of achieving her goals is just as fun as the actual conquest. She has a fiery appetite, and lets us know, with just a look, that she loves competition and has the gamer quality of being stimulated by it.

While certain people (like Lauren Lee and myself) would like to see a more straight-up Doomsday-sexy-type Liliana at some point, Argyle did a great job of making the current iteration read as potentially dangerous, yet simultaneously soft enough to not be too intimidating. In real life, if you see girls like this, proceed with caution. Liliana’s reserve is not a girlish accident. It is a professional’s cloak—and believe me, she has the dagger in there somewhere.

Angelina in Hackers: If she can handle a pool cue, guess what she can do to your sorry butt . . .

Liliana’s gaze is coy and devious. It speaks of secrets and naughty things you would never suggest yourself but would be more than happy to try sometime. Remember Gwendlyn’s command, and Jaya’s dare? Liliana’s gaze is a suggestion. I suggest you watch so-bad-it’s-good Samuel L. Jackson’s Formula 51 flick, a total romp on the power of suggestion. Liliana gives you a prompt; asks you a question. You think you have an answer. There’s your mistake.

Samuel L. Jackson demonstrates a seductive stare. He’s also wearing a kilt. Is it just me, or is it very hot in here suddenly?

There are tons of characters out there who are very attractive but don’t wear their implied prowess on their sleeve and for whom sexiness isn’t something they trade on. These three women are the types who know they’re sexy and who use it to their advantage, albeit in very different ways.

It’s about poker, not Magic, but in this scene from Rounders, we can see how Malkovich’s and Matt Damon’s steamy stare could easily transfer to other battlefields.

While we’re not all out at Magic events trying to hook up, when opportunities arise to engage someone you find attractive in witty conversation or a game of cards, don’t shy away from looking him or her in the eye and showing your confidence and self-assuredness. You can’t read your opponent if you don’t look at, and observe, him or her. You can’t ever win if you don’t play the game.

The bigger your score, the bigger your rocket. Ah, Nintendo.

Until next time, remember that love games are really more like Tetris than Halo. So keep it light, turn up the goofy music, and find someone to make Magic with.

—MJ

@moxymtg on Twitter

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