I'll tell you a secret. *whispers* The Dimir: U/B guild really exists. Okay, got that? Now, if you're keen on tapping on Black and Blue mana here are the best commanders to run.

5. Xanathar, Guild Kingpin

Behold! Starting off our list of dastardly ne'er-do-wells is Xanathar, Guild Kingpin. This 6 mana 5/6 beholder has only one ability but it's a nasty one. During each of your upkeeps, you get to choose one opponent. With Xanathar's big eye, you can take a peek at the top of their library and get to choose to either play a land or the spell that is on top of it without color restrictions. Oh, and they can't do almost anything about it because they can't cast any spells on that turn. Mean.

Leaning in to theme of stealing your opponents' stuff is what this Kingpin wants best. Thief of Sanity, Gonti, Lord of Luxury, and Hostage Taker are perfect additions to Xanathar's guild. Memory Lapse is the best counterspell you can run. But, if you really want Xanathar to take off, then Paradox Haze is the best card in your deck.

4. Phenax, God of Deception

If Dimir: U/B can do one thing better than any other color pair, it's milling. And no commander mills like Phenax, God of Deception. This 4/7 indestructible enchantment creature gives all your creatures the activated ability to tap and mill a target player for how much their toughness is. Phenax likes critters with big behinds and he does not lie. Filling up your deck with high toughness creatures like Charix, the Raging Isle, Tree of Perdition, and Wrexial, the Risen Deep.

Of course, adding in creatures who can mill on their own like The Mindskinner, Consuming Aberration, and Ruin Crab are par for the course. Mindcrank, Mesmeric Orb, Memory Erosion, and Fraying Sanity are other noncreature permanents that Phenax needs to mill with ease.

3. Ertai Resurrected

There's something to be said about having the right answer at the right time. In a game of Magic: the Gathering, answers come in the form of permission spells like Counterspell or removal like Murder. Ertai Resurrected is a 4-mana 3/2 with Flash that lets you have both options available in the command zone. When Ertai enters the battlefield, you can choose to either destroy a creature or a planeswalker or counter a spell, an activated ability, or a triggered ability. Whatever you choose, the opponent gets to draw a card but that's nothing if you've just removed a scary threat or countered their combo piece. Oh, and to clarify, Ertai Resurrected has Flash so you can do this anytime you want or need to.

Having this flexibility allows you to build a control shell around Ertai. But, to make sure that the control he gives is not a one and done deal, flicker effects can let you reuse his modal ability agian and again. Essence Flux, Ghostly Flicker, and Planar Incision are amazing instants to have on hand to blink Ertai to deal with a new problem.

Doubling down on the control with premiere permission like Swan Song, Force of Will, and Force of Negation makes the table ask you everytime if there spells resolved. Including kill spells like Feed the Swarm, Damnation, and Cyclonic Rift lets you take care of things that get past your counter Magic: The Gathering. If you really want to up the consistency, Mystical Tutor, Vampiric Tutor, Demonic Tutor, and Waterlogged Teachings lets you find the answer you need from your library.

2. The Scarab God

Zombies are one of Magic: the Gathering's most popular creature archetypes. While there are other Dimir: U/B commanders like Grimgrin, Corpse-Born, Wilhelt, the Rotcleaver, and Gisa and Geralf none of them can be called the God of zombies. The Scarab God is a 5 mana 5/5 that makes all opponents lose X life while letting you scry X equal to how many zombies you control. For 4 mana, it also has an activated ability that exiles a creature from any graveyard and makes a 4/4 zombie copy of it. What's more, The Scarab God also cheats commander tax because it goes back to hand at the end step if ever it dies. So much value for 4 mana!

Pumping out zombies to drain the table is this commander's main objective. Pumping out the undead with cards like Endless Ranks of the Dead, Army of the Damned, Grave Titan, and Dreadhorde Invasion starts the zombie apocalypse. Beefing up the army of the undead with Diregraf Captain, Death Baron, and Lord of the Accursed is also a way to trample your opponents to death. The Scarab God's ability to basically reanimate any creature from any graveyard makes him terrifying as you'll have the baddest zombie on the board from the yard available.

1. Yuriko, the Tiger's Shadow

Topping our list of devious Dimir: U/B commanders is ninja queen Yuriko, the Tiger's Shadow. For a measly 3 mana this 1/3 can lets you put the top card of your library into your hand for each Ninja that deals damage to an opponent. Then, they all lose life equal to the mana value of the revealed card. What's more, Yuriko will cost 2 mana forever as she also has Commander Ninjutsu.

A powerful Yuriko deck has a healthy number of cheap evasive creatures such as Ornithopter, Slither Blade, and Thousand-Faced Shadow to get the attacks going early. Once they are not blocked, you can ninjutsu out Yuriko.

What you want to reveal from the top of your deck are high cost cards to get whittle down your opponents' life totals. Dig Through Time, Treasure Cruise, and Temporal Trespass are massively costed spells that have Delve so they don't sit in your hand uncastable. That said, top deck manipulation with Brainstorm and Scroll Rack lets you stack your deck for maximum damage.

Devious Plots Require the Best Dimir: U/B Commanders

Secrecy, subterfuge, and strategy are the weapons of a Dimir: U/B player. By sleeving up one of these cunning commanders, you can set the stage for mind games that leave your opponents reeling. With carefully orchestrated plans and plays they'll never anticipate, victory will be yours before they even realize what hit them.